My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4ys, we lives together and have for the entire time. Things were wonderful when we first started things off, sex all the time, having fun together, always touching and kissing, he would hold my hand and be totally into me. But for the past 2.5 years he hasn't been that interested on having sex with me, and he doesn't seem to find me attractive and its really bothering me. HE IS NOT CHEATING.
He works road construction in the summers and is laid off in the winter, I understand when he gets home from work he is tired and thats usually what he tells me is that he's tired and not in the mood, however getting shut down all the time really hurts and makes me feel unatractive.
Even when he is laid off he turns me down, and since he is laid off he can't use work as an excuse. He says he loves me but never tells me I am beautiful and just seems more into his hobbies than is is me, and when we do have sex (maybe 3x a month) it seems like its a chore to him.
I am a very sexual women and would be happy with sex every day however once a week would be wonderful.
He likes to drink a lot and that gets to me as well.
We get into arguments about sex after he turns me down, and its not just the sex that is lacking its the kissing and the touching as well so all aspects of intimacy are lacking.
We were engaged to be married but had a falling out and se now working on getting things back on track with our relationship however the sex is still lacking. He is not one to talk about his feelings and I know most guys aren't.
I abbey been told to just ask him why he doesn't want to have sex, and ask him what is bothering him but he gets angry everytime I want to talk about things and gets annoyed and tells me he's sick of the b.s. and thaylt sex isn't important to him.
I don't get it
either he's an idiot or he's gay
Has your physical appearance changed since you first started dating? Guys are extremely visually oriented. Also, he might be gay. My current gf was married for 6 years and her husband slowly lost interest in her and then suddenly moved out and went to live with a guy. Sudden and unexpected I know, but it happens.
Sh*t... Well. Is he masturbating? First off. A guy's load HAS to go somewhere. Or else the dude is gonna explode!
To be honest I think you're with the wrong guy. It's too late to change him. You deserve better. Try seducing him? Who knows?
Aw, hun. It sounds like you really love him, and I can get why the rejection would hurt so much..Have you tried spicing things up, bringing home toys or sexy outfits? This may sound a little silly, but how about playing hard to get? Instead of trying to get him in bed, don't. Just dress sexier, look sexier, walk around the house in minimal clothing, but don't try to have sex with him. Tempt him/tease him, but don't try to get him in bed. I'm sure he'll either ask why, or try to have sex with you. Maybe its just the fact you're trying so hard that's putting him off.
Good luck <3
talk to him, even if it pisses him off , just sit and talk maybe he'll have something to say after you push a little harder. tell him that if he wants things to work out in your relationship you have to talk about your problems !